"I, Kelsey Burton, am on a mission to finally grow up and forget my embarrassing adolescent alter-ego - but it's gonna be tough while still navigating friendships with clueless childhood pals & a goofy alien fangirling over my old made-up persona." ...Hey now, I take offense to this. I am grown up - and what is this about a made-up alter ego? I have no idea what that's talking about... Should I just keep reading these off? Alright.

Features

• 55K+ Words : "Six content-packed Episodes make for 6+ hours of gameplay on a first playthrough!"
  
• 4th Wall Breaks : "I'm narrating to YOU..." I guess? "Answer choices your own way to unlock three possible endings!" ...Just don't tick me off.
  
• Animation/CGs : "Sprites blink and speak! CGs and animations for key scenes make the story really pop!"
  
• CG Gallery : "40 images and other items to unlock in the Gallery!"
  
• Bonus Content : "Join Moonie for some 'Out Of This World' content at the end of every episode!"
  
• Original Soundtrack : "Poppy, toe-tapping music courtesy of acclaimed VN composer Melia Keys!" ...Yes, that Melia Keys. I don't get it either.

There. That's it. I read the whole thing. Yes, I purposely skipped the part about Melia Keys being "best girl" and the "real star of the game." No, I'm not going back and saying that. I'm going home. Bye.