Patch 1.0.69.420
[ 2024-04-01 08:08:37 CET ] [ Original post ]
These patch notes are totally real.
You can trust me. ( )
Check out the daily streams on Twitch.
You can now also watch on YouTube!
- There are no issues.
Known Issues
- Text has been removed from the game. We've replaced all of the text with cinematics. Each of these will be cut into quarters where each quadrant will be the days most popular TikTok video. We find that this increases player retention dramatically.
- There are now ads between each room. Game development is hard and expensive. Ads allow us to keep making the game to the quality we have been. Running ads between each room just makes cents.
- You can now buy Baron as a micro-transaction.
- The Demo is now only $100 and localized pricing has been removed.
- A VPN is now required to play Heartbound.
- Heartbound is now sponsored by Kernel Level Anti-Cheat. Yes, all of them!
- LOOT BOXES IN BIO
- Each chapter is now a DLC sold for only $15.99.
- The previously mentioned DLC is actually a monthly subscription.
- The monthly subscription does not include the battlepass.
- All socks are now NFTs. Blockchain. Ownership. Money. Web3. Crypto. Investment.
- All art is now AI generated which is clearly better than stinky old human hand made art.
- The OST has been removed and replaced with exclusively Mongolian throat singing.
- Heartbound is now a AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA game. The first of its kind.
- Heartbound has been renamed to Y to follow the great example set by X.
- There is now a $0.99 microtransaction fee to respawn after losing a fight.
- Y now has a new Pay Per Step system! PPS is very innovative.
- Single Player now requires online access at all times.
- Battle Royale mode has been released. Where we droppin?
- Y requires 5 Factor Authentication for your account to be approved.
- Y now has extreme time-limited Twitch drops. FOMO is fun!
- Y now has a TOS that you must agree to... or else.
- There are a number of new dance emotes in the cash shop.
- There are now hundreds of new hats in the Gacha system.
- All purchases must now be made with Y-Coin a new cryptocurrency minted today.
- Bees.
New Content
- There are no bugs. I am a perfect programmer. ( )
Bug Fixes
- There are no bugs to report so you cannot. ( )
Bug Reporting
- This is all the content you need.
Upcoming Content
Heartbound
Pirate Software
Pirate Software
Indie RPG Adventure Singleplayer
Game News Posts 63
🎹🖱️Keyboard + Mouse
Very Positive
(1986 reviews)
https://www.gopiratesoftware.com/games/Heartbound/
https://store.steampowered.com/app/567380 
The Game includes VR Support
Heartbound - Linux [348.41 M]
Heartbound is a non-traditional role-playing game about a boy and his dog.
Features
- Follow Lore and Baron on their adventures through time and space.
- Handle combat through a series of unique mini-games reminiscent of Wario Ware.
- Change the story through exploration and interaction with the world.
- A massive series of optional cryptographic puzzles that can be solved as a community.
- Varying environments with unique pixel art, an inspired soundtrack, and tons of extra socks.
- That awful feeling when you do something terrible to someone who loves you.
- More gags than you can shake a stick at. Binder can lend you one of his if you don't bring your own.
MINIMAL SETUP
- Processor: 1.2Ghz+Memory: 4 GB RAM
- Memory: 4 GB RAM
- Graphics: 512MB
- Storage: 500 MB available spaceAdditional Notes: This game is locked to 60 frames per second.
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