We are Balloon Co. [gaming division] and we are the creators of the game Proxyrunner:Pilcrow Shift. All of you cool chaps and honeys who are familiar with Balloon Co. [gaming division] already know that this is enough information to know that you will have a quality gaming experience. No further reading is needed for all of you very tasteful video game players.

As for the rest of you that are currently reading and not playing, allow us to cast some light on the shadow that is the darkness of a lack of knowledge. Proxyrunner:Pilcrow Shift is a game worth playing by you. There. That should do it. You now have all the information you need to start playing Proxyrunner:Pilcrow Shift.

But... if you are still reading, then that means you are not playing DESPITE all the shadow destroying we did with our knowledge metaphor light! We at Balloon Co. [gaming division] are aware that most itch.io game descriptions give you information about the genre of game or how it works or summarize the plot for you. WE AT BALLOON CO. [gaming division] REFUSE TO COPY THESE VIAL TACTICS THAT WOULD SPOIL YOUR PRISTINE GAMING EXPERIENCE WITH SPOILERS!

Please do not misunderstand. We REALLY desire to tell you droplets of juicenuggety tidbits about Proxyrunner:Pilcrow Shift. Balloon Co. [marketing division] employees are literally pulling on their hair in agony as they watch us type this up. They scream the siren song of “Anyone still reading would be in the target demographic of people who enjoy reading, and thus would enjoy knowing this game has” and I am going to protect you, dear reader, from the words that I too long to type for your eyeballs, but resist for your future enjoyment of Proxyrunner:Pilcrow Shift. I even refuse to confirm or deny if this game involves reading at all. (Refusing to confirm or deny is a tactic we learned from our lawyers!)

Go now, and now turn your protected future enjoyment of Proxyrunner:Pilcrow Shift into NOW enjoyment of Proxyrunner:Pilcrow Shift right now!